I’ve written hundreds of blogs, thousands of songs and countless artworks and other projects. But here’s a thing: I still feel like I’m not good enough.

I mean, if I was actually good enough, wouldn’t I have some bigger results by now? Shouldn’t I feel differently?

Did you know 85% of the world struggles with self esteem and confidence? Sooo…most people are just walking around feeling like they’re not good enough. That’s horrible math!

But hey, at least we’re not alone lol.

But when you really think about it, if 85% of the world was actually “not good enough”, wouldn’t things be falling apart?

Obviously, this is a false narrative. Obviously, most people are “good enough”.

So what gives?

Let’s unpack some sht.

Table of Contents

You’re Probably Better Than You Think

Sure, a little bit of humility looks good. But too much is dumb.

So the first order of business is to accept one simple truth (something I’m reminding myself of right now as I write this line):

YOU’RE VERY LIKELY MUCH BETTER THAN YOU GIVE YOURSELF CREDIT FOR.

Read that again and let it sink in. Because it’s easy to forget how far you’ve come. It can feel like everyone else is better or naturally gifted and you’re just doomed to suck.

So let’s make a pact. Let’s stop the negative self talk.

I’ll try if you try.

Deal?

Good.

Alright, so why do we feel like we’re not good enough anyways? I guess it’s different for everyone, but here are some things that come to mind for me:

Unrealistic expectations
Unrealistic timelines
The ‘curse of knowledge’ bias
Comparison culture
Inaccurate portrayals of people online
New trends and tech constantly making you feel like you missed another boat

The truth is, no matter where you are, there will always be someone better than you (or who knows more than you).

But at the same time, there will always be someone who knows less than you.

Even a beginner who has only recently discovered some new interest is ahead of someone who is still unaware.

Dunning-Kruger. Confirmation Bias.

This is interesting. The more “good enough” you get, the less “good enough” you might feel.

It’s called the Dunning-Kruger Effect: the more skilled or knowledgeable you become at something, the more you’ll realize what you don’t know and everything you still need to learn.

It’s the realization that you still have a long way to go, which can lead to self doubt—even if you are, by all accounts, quite good.

In a related way, when you do become super freaking good at something, it becomes so second nature that you sorta forget it’s even a noteworthy skill or special knowledge.

This is called the curse of knowledge bias (I mentioned it above).

So step back. Appreciate where you are and what you actually know.

And if you are realizing how much more you still have to learn to be “good”, then celebrate that because it’s the Dunning-Kruger Effect telling you that you are farther along than most people who stay in beginner naïveté land (where they believe they do know everything because they watched one video).

The better you get, the more humble you get.

You’re probably better and smarter than you think.

Undervaluing the Power of Serendipity

Sometimes, hindsight and serendipity take a while to realize.

I get impatient, for sure.

But if you stick around long enough, eventually things happen. Seemingly unrelated knowledge or experiences come together in surprising ways.

Steve Jobs talked about this in his Stanford speech.

So don’t be too impatient or so quick to judge what you’ve done so far—even if it feels random as fck.

You may be surprised to learn that (someday in the future) that “unimportant” experience, random skill or interesting knowledge is exactly what’s needed and exactly what will set you apart from the rest.

So trust the process.

Plus, Growth Is Subtle (but compounds)

*Even just improving 1% everyday will compound over time.*

Even improving by just 1% everyday compounds like crazy over time.

I Forget About the Zone of Proximal Development Too

The zone of proximal development is the area just beyond your current skills and knowledge. You’re challenged, but not too challenged. This is the sweet spot for growth.

Basically, don’t try to learn a skill that’s five steps ahead of your current level. This definitely leads to feeling like you’re not good at anything.

And A Growth Mindset Is Just Annoying Sometimes

Sometimes, the last thing I want to hear when I’m wallowing in victim mindset is upbeat growth mindset positivity.

Even if it is true and I know it helps.

Still, when I’m feeling like I’m not good at anything, a lot of this mood is coming from a fixed mindset.

So even if it is annoying, I try to snap back into a more positive (and realistic) growth way of thinking.

Wasn’t This Supposed to Be Fun?

If I’m really feeling like crap (for a long time), then I try to remind myself that this (everything) is supposed to be fun.

Especially for creative work or personal projects.

Music production is one example for me. Learning was painful. I’d show up with inspiration, but quickly realize how many skills I still had to learn. So I felt like crap…like I’d never be good enough.

I wasn’t having fun with a passion I’ve had from childhood.

Lame!

This is supposed to be fun. So I say, be bad. Be weird. Be illogical and break the rules.

Who cares if you’re not “good enough”. What matters most is if you’re having fun.

Later ✌️

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